for·ev·er.

without ever ending;

 eternally

Before I got married

Thinking about spending

A lifetime with ONE person seemed

Impossible. Painful. Boring.

Never mind forever

I was scared of that word

Terrified

I couldn't understand why people

Were so eager to become a spouse

It made me sick to my stomach

Literally

Usually, I'm right about stuff

So when Josh first came along...I wasn't buying it

He was my friend

I didn't need him in my life

I just liked him there

I started panicking when I realized

How serious my feelings for this tall, punk kid really were

(It made me sick to my stomach)

So whatever

I let him be my boyfriend

I wasn't going to rush into a marriage

I would marry him in five years

Maybe

If I still liked him

But if you give Josh an inch

He will certainly take a mile

He wanted to be my fiance

Which is funny

Because I am positive he'd never

EVER do that again

So finally I did it

I jumped with both feet into that coldish water

And I understood

You have to get the inevitable over with

The flowers and stuff

The stress

The planning

The scary part of just committing to something

Because afterwards

You get to swim

Or in my case...try not to drown

You get to come home from work and hang out

With your best friend

And you can say, "Hey best friend...Let's play Just Dance"

And he'll say, "Nah. You play and I'll watch"

Which doesn't sound cool

And now that I think of it...It isn't really that cool

But then we kiss and stuff

And that is always cool

I need Josh

And guess what else?

I want him

I made him mine

FOR-EV-ER

And now all that thought does to my stomach?

Is make it happy

Josh

I LOVE YOU