a situation of which the outcome
is suspensefully uncertain up to the very last moment.
Remember that nice day I was excited about?
Well it was nice.
So nice in fact, Josh and I
Decided we should go on a hike
We picked Adam's Canyon
Because it is close to us
And because I had never done it before
I feel sad admitting that
But it is true
And I think now....saying that I have "hiked" Adam's Canyon
Is shortchanging my experience, really
Because we didn't merely hike the canyon
We freaking survived a dangerous trek up that canyon
We left our blood, sweat, and urine up there
I thought the switchbacks would be the most intense part of our journey
So when we made it past those?
I was feeling pretty pumped...But...
Somehow we ended up holding on to a rope,
Pulling ourselves up HUGE snow drifts
This was not something I anticipated
Or wanted to do
But Josh was loving this brutal adventure
So I kept going, to humor him.
Once we made it to the waterfall, I had renewed hope
I felt like we could do anything
We had kept going when the other hikers had turned back!
We made it!
I started to think about those snow drifts I had to pull myself up.
How would I get back down that steep, SLICK drift?
On my butt of course.
Josh went down first (on his feet, holding the rope)
So that he could catch me? Or somehow stop me?
Before I slid off the the little cliff into the river.
Sounded like a great plan.
So got into position: Knees bent. Butt on snow.
I started out with perfect form.
I intended to have somewhat of a controlled butt-slide
But I soon realized I had NO control whatsoever
I was probably going thirty miles an hour
Josh claims I balled up which made me pick up even more speed
I was going to knock Josh off the mountain with me
I was positive.
He was reaching for me and I was headed for the river...
At the last second, literally, I somehow steered myself
AWAY from Josh and accepted my fate
But as I was preparing to die
I saw twigs of some sort poking up through the snow
I reached across my body and grabbed onto them
Praying that they were strong enough to save my life
And before I knew it
I was flipped over onto my stomach
With my lower body dangling off of the cliff
It was a cartoon
For a second
And I believe that is when Josh peed.
(Once he knew I was OK)
He didn't get out of there without a few injuries himself
You'll see proof below.